The Final Cut: Thriller: You Are Mine

February 12, 2015

Or, as the title reads on Amazon: Thriller: You are Mine (Murder, Darkness, Suspense, Thriller, Twisted Plot, Mystery, Investigate, Loneliness, Shocking, Fear, Alone, Mysterious)

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Tags: bad font choice, filteriffic, layers upon layers

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misterfweem

9 years ago

From the description: “Enlisting the help of her long time friend and detective, James, the new apartment appears to be threatening her.”

Hon, he’s probably not your friend if he and your spooky, haunted apartment are in cahoots.

Karl

9 years ago

Reply to misterfweem

Actually, I think James is the name of the new apartment. Also James-the-apartment appears to be the one who’s enlisting the help of her long time friend and detective. But who is this mysterious friend and detective? And who’s friend and detective is he? Is James-the-apartment the first “her”? If s/he is also the second “her,” then s/he’d is apparently threatening him/herself. Is this a novel about a sentient female apartment with a gender-bending name and self-destructive tendencies? Will her long time friend and detective be able to help her? Can romance bloom between a long time detective and an emotionally troubled sentient apartment? We’ll just have to read the book and see.

misterfweem

9 years ago

Reply to Karl

I’ve always wanted an apartment named James.

Catie

9 years ago

Keywords, you’re doing it wrong.

This font, however, has been overdone to death. I’ll give them credit for not putting that ghastly 3D effect on it, though. Even though they did put the stupid gradient.

Catie

9 years ago

Reply to Catie

Oh, and is “thriller” part of the title or another tag? “Thriller” is a very unimaginative title for a thriller.

9 years ago

I didn’t mind this cover until I saw the gunk behind the name. And the metadata nightmare has to go. (I’d probably discard the eyes and change the font, but as it is, it may be in the ballpark.)