Crazy: I just reviewed the Smashwords page and this has a dual Editor Credit for both John Travolta and George Costanza! Snazzy!
Kris
9 years ago
“I reside in Los Angeles, California, with my loving wife and two young children. I used to be a teacher. Though I left fulltime teaching in classrooms in order to pursue writing…”
With zero sales or reviews in a month, I wonder how that’s working out for him?
Smithy was standing right in front of the light at the end of a long tunnel staring down at a chance, maybe his only chance, to break the curse of almost… Indeed, the moment of the Bubble was here.
Then he heard her roar. She had let out a grunt, and her blaring eyes were shooting a laser beam directly aimed at him. Her fiery locks tossed about like angry flames. She exposed her sharp canines, hissing at him like a vampire. “DON’T GET IN MY WAY!” Smithy remembered her warning and briefly halted in midstride to the chair, and time seemed to slow down for him. Adrenalin coursed through his veins. His fists tightened, and his legs tensed as he crouched down. His focus was so intense that he could hear a pin drop. He registered every gasp coming from his classmates. He winced at the sound of Marsha’s knuckles cracking. They sounded like bones breaking, his bones… He gulped once more and quickly turned his eyes to Mr. Facile. The grey teacher was sitting behind his organ, all smiles with his thick bottle-cap spectacles and completely oblivious to the threat Smithy faced.
“Taekwondo Flying Sidekick!” he yelped as he leaped into the air like the eagle he was meant to be.
A lot of the covers shown here look almost like mock-ups for what could be decent covers, if only the ideas were given to someone with the right skill set. This is the first I’ve seen where it looks like somebody with the right skill set actually started making a decent cover, then gave up.
The author is not an 8th grader, he was a teacher.
If you go off the stuff that uses worse art on purpose to convey the fact that the protagonist is the artist, like say Diary of a wimpy kid… then no. This isn’t good. It is terribly unfinished in the worse ways.
It could have been a good emotional pull, but as this stands it is not.
The typesetting should not have been hand drawn, it should be off the art. The author name should not be bigger than the title.
Side Note: Where is the rest of the kid’s left arm? I know, perspective is happening, but dang, is that bad.
Additional Side Note: Why is being cursed to almost always win such a bad thing? Enter the Olympics and sweep the whole thing of silver medals! Be on cereal boxes for life, make a killing in the black market silver trade.
Crazy: I just reviewed the Smashwords page and this has a dual Editor Credit for both John Travolta and George Costanza! Snazzy!
“I reside in Los Angeles, California, with my loving wife and two young children. I used to be a teacher. Though I left fulltime teaching in classrooms in order to pursue writing…”
With zero sales or reviews in a month, I wonder how that’s working out for him?
It’s a bit, um… esoteric… for an 8-year-old:
Smithy was standing right in front of the light at the end of a long tunnel staring down at a chance, maybe his only chance, to break the curse of almost… Indeed, the moment of the Bubble was here.
Then he heard her roar. She had let out a grunt, and her blaring eyes were shooting a laser beam directly aimed at him. Her fiery locks tossed about like angry flames. She exposed her sharp canines, hissing at him like a vampire. “DON’T GET IN MY WAY!” Smithy remembered her warning and briefly halted in midstride to the chair, and time seemed to slow down for him. Adrenalin coursed through his veins. His fists tightened, and his legs tensed as he crouched down. His focus was so intense that he could hear a pin drop. He registered every gasp coming from his classmates. He winced at the sound of Marsha’s knuckles cracking. They sounded like bones breaking, his bones… He gulped once more and quickly turned his eyes to Mr. Facile. The grey teacher was sitting behind his organ, all smiles with his thick bottle-cap spectacles and completely oblivious to the threat Smithy faced.
“Taekwondo Flying Sidekick!” he yelped as he leaped into the air like the eagle he was meant to be.
(What are “blaring” eyes?)
I assume its an eggcorn for blazing eyes.
A lot of the covers shown here look almost like mock-ups for what could be decent covers, if only the ideas were given to someone with the right skill set. This is the first I’ve seen where it looks like somebody with the right skill set actually started making a decent cover, then gave up.
In fairness, if it were drawn by an 8th grader, I would have said it was really good.
The author is not an 8th grader, he was a teacher.
If you go off the stuff that uses worse art on purpose to convey the fact that the protagonist is the artist, like say Diary of a wimpy kid… then no. This isn’t good. It is terribly unfinished in the worse ways.
It could have been a good emotional pull, but as this stands it is not.
The typesetting should not have been hand drawn, it should be off the art. The author name should not be bigger than the title.
Side Note: Where is the rest of the kid’s left arm? I know, perspective is happening, but dang, is that bad.
Additional Side Note: Why is being cursed to almost always win such a bad thing? Enter the Olympics and sweep the whole thing of silver medals! Be on cereal boxes for life, make a killing in the black market silver trade.