The Love Police

The Love Police

What the actual what the

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Hitch
2 years ago

Y’know, when you see “no comments” on a cover like this…it’s apropos. It’s hard to know what on bleeding earth to say. I’m pretty sure that–and this is hard to determine, well and truly–that the cardigan(s) that the Gater/Croc is/are wearing is/are the most mind-blowing part. Or…maybe it’s the pink splooge?

Is that a Ghostbusters reference? The pink splooge, from the 2nd movie?

Mother of God, does ANYONE, anywhere, know what the holy hell is going on with this cover? And is there a living, breathing human being that would actually click on this, interested in buying, rather than wondering “what the holy Eff is going on here?”

Man, this one, Nathan–this has to be an auto-nominee for LBC’s Lousies. GOTTA BE.

LBC Participant
LBC Participant
2 years ago
Reply to  Hitch

and how does any of it relate to the title?

LBC Participant
LBC Participant
2 years ago
Reply to  Nathan

I do not.

Zsuzsa
Zsuzsa
2 years ago
Reply to  Hitch

Man, this one, Nathan–this has to be an auto-nominee for LBC’s Lousies. GOTTA BE.

Don’t tempt fate like that. You don’t really want to imply that it’s impossible for October to produce 3 covers worse than this, do you?

Marc
Marc
2 years ago
Reply to  Hitch

I think it’s a regular business suit, plus tummy scales because alligator.

Hitch
2 years ago
Reply to  Marc

Nah, that’s gotta be a cardi, no? Really? Biz suit? Hmmmm….

RK@HM
RK@HM
2 years ago
Reply to  Hitch

Well, I seem to remember Loggins & Messina mentioning something to which this title alludes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTu4yQH8KBs
“Outta the car, longhair!”

Julie
Julie
2 years ago
Reply to  Hitch

The pink splooge is apparently glue. Because we don’t shoot people anymore in 2121. And that is supposed to be an alligator in a three-piece suit.

Robbie
Robbie
2 years ago
Reply to  Hitch

It’s just… the only comment I had was

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *deep breath* HAHAHAHAHAHA

Marc
Marc
2 years ago

I showed this one to my wife. A rare event; it’s special.

Hitch
2 years ago
Reply to  Marc

Not a very kind way to acknowledge her for agreeing to marry you in the first place….

¯\_(܍Д܍)_/¯

Ian
Ian
2 years ago

So many questions and yet I don’t want to hear any answers.

Julie
Julie
2 years ago

Our lady protag is 53 years old, full-figured, with a large pair of chesteses.

No. That is not a typo. The trainwreck continues inside.

LBC Participant
LBC Participant
2 years ago
Reply to  Julie

If you’re snickering while writing your “Book”, perhaps it’s best to set it aside for twenty years and resume once you’ve become an adult.

Hitch
2 years ago
Reply to  Julie

Oh, yeah, it does. I made it to the point where the “protagonists,” written in some sort of pseudo-present-tense fashion, discuss how the evildoer should have been “counseled as soon as he displayed ‘pre-violent’ behavior,” and gave up. (Yeah, so tell me, what’s “pre-violent” behavior? Losing your sense of humor? Being annoyed? Yelling? Hell, where’s the Pre-Crime Unit* when you need ’em?)

sigh.

*H/T Minority Report–and we all know how well THAT worked out…

Another Bob
Another Bob
2 years ago

I just want to take a moment to thank everyone who posted a comment on this cover. You have all managed to say pretty much everything I was struggling to find the words to say myself. And a big thumbs up to Hitch, whose opening salvo nailed it so thoroughly.

Last edited 2 years ago by Another Bob
Hitch
2 years ago
Reply to  Another Bob

Well, thank you kindly, @Another Bob, for those kind words.

Naaman Brown
Naaman Brown
2 years ago

a “… hilarious and socially woke story …”

Scott
1 year ago

The alligator is a Senator, that’s why he’s wearing a three-piece suit.
The pink goo is glue, which cops spray on criminals to catch them without harming them.
The book is titled The Love Police because it is about a police force based on restorative justice rather than punitive justice.
I think it’s great that this cover sparked a lively conversation.

Hitch
1 year ago
Reply to  Scott

And your name just coincidentally happens to be the same name as the author, is that right?

You may want to consider that if we don’t know what your cover is saying–nobody else does, either. Which is the worst-possible scenario for a cover.