At first glance, this doesn’t really look like too bad of a cover, but the longer you look the worse it gets. Why are there two sidewalk stones randomly sitting there to be stood on? Why is the axe backwards in the dwarf’s hand? Why is the dwarf not-so-subtlely staring at the human’s pecker? Why is there a football helmet on the human’s chest? And finally, that sword is clearly stolen from Skyrim.
And how horrible were the speech patterns that they had to be taken out? I am guessing the dwarves had a horribly over-the-top Scottish brogue. “Dun ya unnerstahn me, boyo? Ah’m talkin’ purfick, dun ya knew.”
I read some of the reviews and one of the reviewers gave this quote from the book to show how the elves spoke.
“Does tell mine-self to wait, and I does think it does be for thou wait for I does.”
Also, the author broke Rule #1, never reply to a review. He did it anyway in defense of his story and came across as an asshole. I’ve included the author’s reply in this comment as well for your enjoyment.
Review:
“The author did a poor job of telling a standard tale. The construction of the title and first sentence of this review is the authors standard tool in telling the story. It gets terribly annoying quite quickly. Since the story itself is the standard “suddenly our heros were transported to a fantasy world” novel and it contains no innovation nor insight on the genre it was not worth finishing. Don’t waste your time.”
Author’s Reply to the review:
“I can only assume that you picked this book up during my free offer on Oct 1, posted your review on Oct 2, and I highly suspect you, unlike most, lost interest quickly. (I have actually watched readers rent all three books in three days)
Even though your review was more cryptic than concise, I would like to address some of the points.
1) Innovation: The method to transport the heroes was extremely innovative, but that point is not revealed until book 3, for obvious reasons. The six-foot sword forged by four-foot tall dwarves was also exceptionally original. The absence of a mentor character (i.e. Obi-Wan Kenobi or Gandalf) also breaks a standard storytelling methodology. As well, there is more, including character development, the magic system, and much more – but that all starts where chapter one ends.
2) Unlike many other books, it is free of the standard clichés, and foreseeable events never transpire in a predictable fashion.
3) The first paragraph after ‘Books Written by P.G. Thomas’ explains my writing.
Even though these are the first books I have written, they were crafted to be a trilogy, and as such, every event was designed and placed for a particular reason. Thus, my trilogy design is simple: book one is the foundation for all three, and it can be thought of as the entrance to a movie theatre. Book two is the structure that supports the series, being like the inside of the cinema. However, only in book three does the show take place. The main reason to read one my trilogies is not the first book, as I am cautious on how I meter out my stories. The reason you want to read all three is simple; book three will provide a conclusion that few books have achieved, which the reviews for Blood Bond validate.
4) I am unaware of how common ‘portal’ adventures are. When I did the majority of my reading, I never once found that used that plot mechanism. If it has now become such a standard, forgive me, as I was oblivious to this trend.
In conclusion, I would like to thank you for your review.
In response to numbers 1 and 4, these are various media that PD Thomas claims he never heard of:
Alice in wonderland, Wizard of Oz, Peter Pan, Chronicles of Narnia, The Golden Compass series, Dragon Tales, the Spiderwick Chronicles, Coraline, the Inkheart series, the Outlander Series.
Basically, you shouldn’t trust his judgement on stuff he claims is “innovative”. And even if anything he came up with was original that wouldn’t make his book any good…
And in response him price-shaming: The customer is not entitled to give you a good review if they got it for free. Does he think that’s a good thing to reveal? If they gave you a bad review, that means they read the book for free and still felt ripped off.
His excuse about it all coming together in the final book doesn’t work either. The reader needs to be kept interested enough to want to read to the last book and not feel forced simply because it’s that way by design. Then entire series/trilogy should be rewarding, not just the end of the final book.
Yeah, it’s self-publishers like this that give the rest of us a bad name. The first thing I did once I published my book was attempt to break the stigma.
Clearly Gimli is wondering why his partner is carrying the sword from Skyrim. Why is the football helmet a simple inverse silhouette pasted over the armor?
The art itself is okay, but check out the blurb for it on Amazon. Most of the text there is about how the author ran the book through a grammar checker to analyze his style and how much it improved after editing, in what specific ways.
I’m not sure I would have gone with an algorithm to decide whether or not a book I’ve just written is any good. There is a reason that new stories are still written by humans; computers can’t account for personal tastes.
B.L. Alley
5 years ago
I’m even more baffled as to what I’ve done wrong after seeing this author’s body of work and the number of reviews he’s received.
His covers are the same image with different characters and images pasted over it for each book.
He explains his writing technique to the readers, including posting the stats from Pro Writing Aid in the blurb.
He openly praises himself for being innovative and original while presenting exceptionally familiar material.
Starting every sentence with a prepositional phrase, his writing quickly becomes exhausting.
At first glance, this doesn’t really look like too bad of a cover, but the longer you look the worse it gets. Why are there two sidewalk stones randomly sitting there to be stood on? Why is the axe backwards in the dwarf’s hand? Why is the dwarf not-so-subtlely staring at the human’s pecker? Why is there a football helmet on the human’s chest? And finally, that sword is clearly stolen from Skyrim.
And how horrible were the speech patterns that they had to be taken out? I am guessing the dwarves had a horribly over-the-top Scottish brogue. “Dun ya unnerstahn me, boyo? Ah’m talkin’ purfick, dun ya knew.”
I read some of the reviews and one of the reviewers gave this quote from the book to show how the elves spoke.
“Does tell mine-self to wait, and I does think it does be for thou wait for I does.”
Also, the author broke Rule #1, never reply to a review. He did it anyway in defense of his story and came across as an asshole. I’ve included the author’s reply in this comment as well for your enjoyment.
Review:
“The author did a poor job of telling a standard tale. The construction of the title and first sentence of this review is the authors standard tool in telling the story. It gets terribly annoying quite quickly. Since the story itself is the standard “suddenly our heros were transported to a fantasy world” novel and it contains no innovation nor insight on the genre it was not worth finishing. Don’t waste your time.”
Author’s Reply to the review:
“I can only assume that you picked this book up during my free offer on Oct 1, posted your review on Oct 2, and I highly suspect you, unlike most, lost interest quickly. (I have actually watched readers rent all three books in three days)
Even though your review was more cryptic than concise, I would like to address some of the points.
1) Innovation: The method to transport the heroes was extremely innovative, but that point is not revealed until book 3, for obvious reasons. The six-foot sword forged by four-foot tall dwarves was also exceptionally original. The absence of a mentor character (i.e. Obi-Wan Kenobi or Gandalf) also breaks a standard storytelling methodology. As well, there is more, including character development, the magic system, and much more – but that all starts where chapter one ends.
2) Unlike many other books, it is free of the standard clichés, and foreseeable events never transpire in a predictable fashion.
3) The first paragraph after ‘Books Written by P.G. Thomas’ explains my writing.
Even though these are the first books I have written, they were crafted to be a trilogy, and as such, every event was designed and placed for a particular reason. Thus, my trilogy design is simple: book one is the foundation for all three, and it can be thought of as the entrance to a movie theatre. Book two is the structure that supports the series, being like the inside of the cinema. However, only in book three does the show take place. The main reason to read one my trilogies is not the first book, as I am cautious on how I meter out my stories. The reason you want to read all three is simple; book three will provide a conclusion that few books have achieved, which the reviews for Blood Bond validate.
4) I am unaware of how common ‘portal’ adventures are. When I did the majority of my reading, I never once found that used that plot mechanism. If it has now become such a standard, forgive me, as I was oblivious to this trend.
In conclusion, I would like to thank you for your review.
Sincerely
P.G. Thomas”
In response to numbers 1 and 4, these are various media that PD Thomas claims he never heard of:
Alice in wonderland, Wizard of Oz, Peter Pan, Chronicles of Narnia, The Golden Compass series, Dragon Tales, the Spiderwick Chronicles, Coraline, the Inkheart series, the Outlander Series.
Basically, you shouldn’t trust his judgement on stuff he claims is “innovative”. And even if anything he came up with was original that wouldn’t make his book any good…
And in response him price-shaming: The customer is not entitled to give you a good review if they got it for free. Does he think that’s a good thing to reveal? If they gave you a bad review, that means they read the book for free and still felt ripped off.
His excuse about it all coming together in the final book doesn’t work either. The reader needs to be kept interested enough to want to read to the last book and not feel forced simply because it’s that way by design. Then entire series/trilogy should be rewarding, not just the end of the final book.
You have to wonder if all these self-publishing hacks actually, you know, read.
Yeah, it’s self-publishers like this that give the rest of us a bad name. The first thing I did once I published my book was attempt to break the stigma.
Clearly Gimli is wondering why his partner is carrying the sword from Skyrim. Why is the football helmet a simple inverse silhouette pasted over the armor?
Now 60% less annoying!
I love how he can’t admit the fake speech was a mistake, even as he is attempting to correct it,
The art itself is okay, but check out the blurb for it on Amazon. Most of the text there is about how the author ran the book through a grammar checker to analyze his style and how much it improved after editing, in what specific ways.
After reading that, I’m not sure that this author could pass a Turing test.
I’m not sure I would have gone with an algorithm to decide whether or not a book I’ve just written is any good. There is a reason that new stories are still written by humans; computers can’t account for personal tastes.
I’m even more baffled as to what I’ve done wrong after seeing this author’s body of work and the number of reviews he’s received.
His covers are the same image with different characters and images pasted over it for each book.
He explains his writing technique to the readers, including posting the stats from Pro Writing Aid in the blurb.
He openly praises himself for being innovative and original while presenting exceptionally familiar material.
Starting every sentence with a prepositional phrase, his writing quickly becomes exhausting.
SIGH