I’m disappointed. When i read the title, I was hoping for some epic fail (and some tits and ass, to be honest. Cudos to the author for not going that way), but this is merely not good. Easily fixed by treating the fonts in a less appalling manor.
Kathrite
9 years ago
I dunno, I seriously think tits and ass would be an improvement over this cover image. This guy looks more like he’s balancing his finances than writing erotica.
Though if he IS writing erotica, I’m tempted to speculate about where the calculator comes in…
This books is number 642,251 on the Amazon list for self help erotica writing titles.
Erotica with self help is double the amount of genres. So we multiply the result by two to get the actual listing.
642,251 x 2 = 1,284,502.
We then take the authors name and we average those amount of letters out to 3.5 thanks. In doing sexy calculations we always round up (as any man with a measuring tape can tell you). Finally we multiply our duo results together to get the humour product.
Now I’m curious, how does someone writing erotica look like? How do you tell your ordinary fiction writer from erotica writer? One hand inside the pants, maybe? Suspicious stains on their trousers? Weird facial expressions? I wish I knew some erotica writers so I could stalk them and find out.
Yeah, I guess the main issue with this image is that the guy doesn’t look like he’s enjoying whatever he’s doing. And odds are, if you’re not enjoying writing it (be it erotica or something else), the readers will not enjoy reading it. And erotica at least should be enjoyable, right? XD
Viergacht
9 years ago
I’m rather tempted, actually. What mythological creatures haven’t had erotica written about them? Manticores?
![cover[1]](https://lousybookcovers.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/cover16.jpg)
I’m disappointed. When i read the title, I was hoping for some epic fail (and some tits and ass, to be honest. Cudos to the author for not going that way), but this is merely not good. Easily fixed by treating the fonts in a less appalling manor.
I dunno, I seriously think tits and ass would be an improvement over this cover image. This guy looks more like he’s balancing his finances than writing erotica.
Though if he IS writing erotica, I’m tempted to speculate about where the calculator comes in…
Clearly you forgot to do the math.
This books is number 642,251 on the Amazon list for self help erotica writing titles.
Erotica with self help is double the amount of genres. So we multiply the result by two to get the actual listing.
642,251 x 2 = 1,284,502.
We then take the authors name and we average those amount of letters out to 3.5 thanks. In doing sexy calculations we always round up (as any man with a measuring tape can tell you). Finally we multiply our duo results together to get the humour product.
1,284,502 x 4 = HP (Humour Product)
Ah ha! And here I thought it had something to do with calculating the tensile strength of nylon rope.
Now I’m curious, how does someone writing erotica look like? How do you tell your ordinary fiction writer from erotica writer? One hand inside the pants, maybe? Suspicious stains on their trousers? Weird facial expressions? I wish I knew some erotica writers so I could stalk them and find out.
Well, I have to imagine the ideal environment for erotica would be less… sterile. So to speak.
But yes, I did also notice that both hands were suspiciously visible.
Yeah, I guess the main issue with this image is that the guy doesn’t look like he’s enjoying whatever he’s doing. And odds are, if you’re not enjoying writing it (be it erotica or something else), the readers will not enjoy reading it. And erotica at least should be enjoyable, right? XD
I’m rather tempted, actually. What mythological creatures haven’t had erotica written about them? Manticores?
*blush*
My book is still away at a press and I am waiting to hear if they will publish it, but the Manticore in it does get ‘double booted’.
It is not a long scene though, mostly just background stuff. I’m sure you could elaborate on Manticores with a full story. Be mindful of the spikes.
Heh, good luck with your book!
Wow thanks for the good thoughts! 😀